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Multicultural marriage is fantastic. There, I said it.
Sometimes it’s easy, in the routines of life, to forget all the enchanting elements that attracted us to cross-cultural marriage in the first place. And sometimes those around us can be quick to remind us of the extra challenges with language, families, and culture.
We know that’s true. But multicultural marriage also offers bonus gifts that we can enjoy and celebrate. Here’s some of the awesomeness that stands out for me.
Grab your passport!
If you like to travel, international marriage is right in your swing zone. I got my very first passport (U.S.) while dating my Guatemalan now-husband. In contrast, both of my kids had passports within the first few weeks of their lives.
Outside of our annual visits to family, my husband’s Spanish, cross-cultural savvy, and adventurous immigrant spirit has opened doors for us to experience the world together. In fact, my four-year old daughter has visited Guatemala, Argentina, and Uruguay.
I could never have imagined how much travel would become a part of my life until I married someone from another country.
Bicultural traditions can enrich your family.
Our family has never taken an “either/or” approach to traditions. We tend be “yes, and…”, which I find to be pretty common among other bicultural couples. So our multicultural family gets my American, stocking-stuffed Christmas morning and a sparkler-wielding, ponche-drinking Nochebuena celebration.
We have found it a delight to celebrate all our traditions. Whether it’s birthday piñatas or visiting a pumpkin patch, we take what we love best about our backgrounds and mash them up!
You join a secret club.
I know it sounds crazy. But there is something so unique about this multicultural marriage journey, we often experience an instant connection when we meet other cross-cultural couples.
Even though we are a white American/Guatemalan duo, the specifics of culture don’t seem to matter. We just bond, knowing we’re all navigating cultural differences on a day-to-day basis.
It doesn’t take too long before we’re laughing and shouting, “I KNOW! What do our husbands have against peanut butter sandwiches? I don’t get it!!!”
Your worldview expands.
My husband and I have both helped each other to see the world in new ways. One example arose when I became Pinterested in creating tactile play for our toddler using dry beans and rice. My husband could not fathom the privilege of “playing with food” as he rightly called it.
Growing up within eyesight of hunger and poverty in a developing country, he pushed back against the idea. My eyes were opened, and we opted for sand and water instead.
Drive-thrus are terrific comic relief.
Man, if you want some cheap entertainment, bilingual drive-thru experiences top my list. The misunderstandings and confusion always crack me up. (Here’s a loose transcript of one of our visits.)
With a good sense of humor, multicultural marriages can provide howling moments of humor. From marital miscommunications to cultural missteps to children attempting bilingualism, it can all warm your heart and maybe make tea come out your nose.
Marriage, as we know, is not all fun and games, and multicultural ones do have some of their own issues. But we have found that the gifts from our unique backgrounds add a bit of special to our family that we love.
Do these benefits of multicultural marriage ring true for you? What would you add?
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I love your post, yes indeed multicultural marriage is awesome!
Here here! Thanks, Ilze. 🙂
I can totally relate to this article. There may be some difficulties in multicultural marriages but I believe there are far more advantages. One of the biggest things we have had to overcome is our different ideas of bringing up the children (we also had the playing with food problem) but as I am the main caregiver I get to do it mostly my way 😉 It’s all about compromise.
I can totally relate to this article. We are a mix of British with Polish background (me) and Turkish Kurd (hubby). There may be some difficulties in multicultural marriages but I believe there are far more advantages. One of the biggest things we have had to overcome is our different ideas of bringing up the children (we also had the playing with food problem) but as I am the main caregiver I get to do it mostly my way 😉 It’s all about compromise.
So true. All marriages involve compromise, of course, but I think it looks a bit different in multicultural families. But I agree with you – the advantages faaaaar outweigh the challenges! 🙂